" The Groom's Role"

Contrary to previous rumors, grooms do have more to do than just “show up at the church on time”. There may be some who choose not to be involved in the wedding planning process, but many of today’s grooms are interested in helping to plan this milestone moment in their lives. They want to make the wedding itself a truly shared experience. Anna Post assembled the list below for the Emily Post Web site.

Each of these “duties” will not only help the wedding planning process, but will truly make the groom feel more a part of the plans. He certainly can help searching out and selecting the venue for the ceremony and reception, establishing the budget, creating the guest list, making gift registry selections and the critical job of keeping his parents in the loop regarding wedding plans.
                                                                                         


In addition to these functions, the groom’s list includes:

• Selecting the engagement ring – though these days brides may also be involved in selection.

• Choosing his wedding party – best man, groomsmen and ushers.

• Choosing the attire for the groom’s wedding party – in keeping with the style of the wedding.

• Selecting the thank you gifts for his wedding party.

• Selecting the bride’s wedding gift.

• Compiling the groom’s part of the guest list and making sure that his parents provide their guest list in a timely manner.

• Choosing the wedding bands together.

• Arranging for and purchasing the marriage license.

• Arranging for transportation from the ceremony to the reception site.

• Standing in the receiving line and greeting all the guests at the reception.

• Dancing the first dance with the bride, dancing with the couple’s respective mothers and the maid/matron of honor.

• Making appropriate toasts at both the rehearsal dinner and the reception.

Weddings Beautiful hits China!

American firm taps China's huge wedding-planning market

By Sabrina Mao and Terril Yue Jones



BEIJING
Mon Dec 5, 2011 2:32pm EST



BEIJING (Reuters) - As young Chinese become wealthier, there is one area where they are increasingly looking to make a big impression on their families and friends and create lifelong memories for themselves: weddings.

And with Chinese spending some $57 billion a year on weddings and half of young people in this country saying they need help in planning their marriage ceremonies, an American company is looking to capitalize on what it sees as a huge business opportunity here: training Chinese wedding planners.

Weddings Beautiful Worldwide has just set up a joint venture in China to bring its expertise in training wedding planners to this country, where young couples can use help figuring out how to spend the equivalent of thousands of dollars and more to celebrate their nuptials.

"With the fast economic development in China, consumers are choosing more unique and personalized weddings, giving a boost to the wedding industry in China," Raul Vasquez, president of the joint venture, known as Weddings Beautiful China, said in Beijing recently.

Weddings by Ling, the Chinese partner in the venture, is a boutique wedding planning firm catering to high-end Chinese couples, expatriates and Chinese celebrities, and providing online consultation.

It brings a range of established partnerships with flower shops, car rental companies and hotels offering wedding banquets, and other vendors and service providers.

Living in a globally connected world and in a fast-growing economy, young Chinese want not only a traditional, formal Chinese wedding ceremony, but western and modern elements such as walking down the aisle with bridesmaids, ushers, a flower girl and a ring bearer, Vasquez said.

The joint venture plans to groom a new generation of wedding planners through an 18-part training course to become a "certified wedding specialist." -- a career for which there appears to be ample demand.

"I started preparing for my wedding since the beginning of the year by myself, but it was killing me that I didn't have enough time to think about it and make all the arrangements," said Xue Cong, who works at a real estate company in Beijing and who just got married in November.

"Fortunately my friend introduced me to a Chinese wedding planning company which helped me with everything in getting ready for our wedding," said Xue, 27. "They organized a terrific ceremony we will remember all our lives."

There were 250 guests at Xue's wedding, which featured rented Mercedes-Benz limousines and a banquet hall garnished with lights and lilies for a romantic, music-filled party.

Young Chinese are spending more on weddings

With increasing attention on a hopefully once-in-a-lifetime event, greater numbers of young Chinese are pouring more money into wedding-related expenses -- some $57 billion a year, according to the China Wedding Industry Development Report , an industry study. Much of that goes to pre-ceremony photographs, limousine rentals, wedding gowns and honeymoons abroad.

And the price of the all-important wedding banquet has also been steadily rising, accounting for about a tenth of total wedding expenses.

Marriott, the international hotel chain, has seen prices for wedding banquets rise this year by at least 10 percent, reaching into the thousands of yuan per banquet table, but that does not deter young couples from throwing lavish parties.

"We offered various sets of wedding banquets with different prices ranging from 4,888 to more than 10,000 yuan ($770-$1,570) per table," said a saleswoman at a Marriott in eastern Beijing who gave her name as Li.

"Reservations for banquet halls this year have dramatically increased compared to previous years even though the price has risen by hundreds of yuan per banquet table," Li said.

Sales of wedding banquets are so popular that celebrating couples need to book the banquet hall at least six months ahead of time, she said, adding that she has no doubts that prices will rise further next year.

The cost of fresh flowers has also increased, and shoots up especially on popular days which Chinese consider lucky, such as those with even numbers, especially the number eight, which sounds like a Chinese word meaning to bring about wealth.

One rose costs 2 yuan this year, double the price in 2010, says Qin Xiuling, who sells flowers in a wholesale market in west Beijing. Lilies have gone from 8 to 10 yuan this year.

"The price goes up by 30-60 percent during Golden Week which is the most popular time for Chinese wedding," Qin said, referring to the week-long National Day holiday in October. "The price probably will keep going up as long as there are more weddings next year."

And amid increasing wealth and busier social lives, China has seen growing demand for professionals who can take over organizing their weddings. There are 1,168 wedding planning companies registered in Beijing, according to the Committee of Wedding Service Industries.

Weddings Beautiful China, which operates only in Beijing for now, is already attracting students from as far away as Shenzhen and Guangzhou in southern China. But Vasquez says the company limits the numbers of students so as to create an intimate learning environment.

"Our job is not only to teach current and aspiring wedding planners western traditions, but to also make them better entrepreneurs by teaching them business management, customer service, marketing and social media, time management, presentation and communications skills," Vasquez said.

And, he said, teaching the future planners a most important lesson in creating the peperfectfect wedding : "learning to listen to the bride."

Reporting by Sabrina Mao, additional writing by Terril Yue Jones, editing by Paul Casciato)



 

Do Couples Still Register?

WEDDING NOTES

The answer is a resounding yes! What has changed somewhat is the variety of stores and

shops that now provide a bridal registry service. We have learned that many brides

appreciate a little advice on what to do before they make registration selections. In spite of

the publicity being given to some celebrity brides and their “news making” registry choices,

the act of selecting registry sources and gift ideas are not just “gift grabs” as one of our

brides recently stated. Properly used, gift registries are a true service for your wedding

guests. Guests have the assurance of knowing they are giving a gift that will be cherished,

as well as the comfort of knowing that their gift is less likely to be duplicated.

Our first bit of advice is to reassure the bride that registry is “still being done”.

Next we remind the bride that the items chosen will be a part of their lives for years to come,

so choices should not be made in haste – nor should they be made without the groom’s

input.

We urge couples to make their choices in a timely manner so that friends and relatives have

time to purchase the gifts for pre wedding events as well as the wedding itself.

If you have many friends and family who live in a different area from you and the groom, we

advise our brides to include a gift registry source with a national reach. Most retailers have

on line ordering, shipping and registry recording. Today, most registries are electronic and

the bride’s choices are recorded for her along with guest purchases as they are made.

Please don’t let anyone advise you that it is ok to include registry information in your

invitation. IT IS NOT! Many things may have changed about weddings, but this has not

been one of them. It has always been in poor taste and remains so. Because most brides

create their own wedding web site, you can certainly list registry sites there.

Today’s gift registries may be more sophisticated than the early versions, but the goal of

getting information to your guests and helping them make a wonderful selection for you is

the same.

Invitation Etiquette

WEDDING NOTES – Invitation Etiquette

Our invitation specialists help brides create the wedding invitation of their dreams. They

know that the invitation sets the tone for the wedding it announces and as such is an early

indicator for the guests as to the type of celebration to which they are invited. Our experts

field all sorts of questions and are knowledgeable about the various paper styles, font types

and wording variations that brides are seeking. They are also asked about the

appropriateness of certain wording choices. We know that more and more brides are making

selections that blend the historically formal with the contemporary feel of today’s

preferences. However, the rule of good taste does still have punch and invitation specialists

are being asked if it is ok to ask for gifts of money on the wedding invitation. The answer is

a clear and consistent NO!

There is no socially acceptable or tactful way to include in invitation copy the fact that the

couple would prefer cash in place of gifts.

This situation is more likely to occur with a couple in their late 20s or early 30s who have

been living together for some time prior to the wedding. They tend to have all household

necessities and are not inclined to establish a traditional gift registry. They may be planning

to buy a house and would prefer cash gifts. This is a worthy preference but the invitation is

not the place to spread the word. For that they need to rely on word of mouth. The

couple needs to tell their parents, friends, and members of the wedding that when asked

about gift preferences, cash is the couple’s preference. But as Emily Post reminds us, “There

is no dictating to guests what they must give; it’s their prerogative to choose.”

Our consultants recommend that if you are asked directly what you want for a wedding gift,

be polite and say, “We’re saving for a down payment on a house, so if you’d like to give a

check, that’s how we would use it. But whatever you decide will be terrific. Thank you for

thinking of us.”

Not everyone is comfortable giving cash. They don’t like giving money. They prefer a

tangible gift. And that is terrific. And because there are guests with this preference, we

suggest that brides set up a traditional gift registry too to accommodate the guest who

prefers to give a gift other than cash.

Invitation Etiquette

WEDDING NOTES

 Invitation Etiquette


Our invitation specialists help brides create the wedding invitation of their dreams. They
know that the invitation sets the tone for the wedding it announces and as such is an early
indicator for the guests as to the type of celebration to which they are invited. Our experts
field all sorts of questions and are knowledgeable about the various paper styles, font types
and wording variations that brides are seeking. They are also asked about the
appropriateness of certain wording choices. We know that more and more brides are making
selections that blend the historically formal with the contemporary feel of today’s
preferences. However, the rule of good taste does still have punch and invitation specialists
are being asked if it is ok to ask for gifts of money on the wedding invitation. The answer is
a clear and consistent NO!

There is no socially acceptable or tactful way to include in invitation copy the fact that the
couple would prefer cash in place of gifts.
This situation is more likely to occur with a couple in their late 20s or early 30s who have
been living together for some time prior to the wedding. They tend to have all household
necessities and are not inclined to establish a traditional gift registry. They may be planning
to buy a house and would prefer cash gifts. This is a worthy preference but the invitation is
not the place to spread the word. For that they need to rely on word of mouth. The
couple needs to tell their parents, friends, and members of the wedding that when asked
about gift preferences, cash is the couple’s preference. But as Emily Post reminds us, “There
is no dictating to guests what they must give; it’s their prerogative to choose.”

Our consultants recommend that if you are asked directly what you want for a wedding gift,
be polite and say, “We’re saving for a down payment on a house, so if you’d like to give a
check, that’s how we would use it. But whatever you decide will be terrific. Thank you for
thinking of us.”

Not everyone is comfortable giving cash. They don’t like giving money. They prefer a
tangible gift. And that is terrific. And because there are guests with this preference, we
suggest that brides set up a traditional gift registry too to accommodate the guest who
prefers to give a gift other than cash.

What's For Dinner ? Choosing A Wedding Menu

What’s For Dinner?


Choosing A Wedding Menu


Part 2

You know your guests. These people are your friends and family, you know who you invited. Try choosing things that you know most people will enjoy.

Comfort foods, as I mentioned before, is always a good option. If you and your guests are mostly from the Midwest, stick with things that most of your guests will recognize. Meat and potatoes are always great choices, but don’t think that you can’t offer a healthy and one of a kind salad if you have some friends from the West Coast attending. If you are more of an East Coast couple, think about including seafood in the menu. Just make sure you offer another option in case someone’s guest is allergic.

You can’t please everyone. Keep in mind, it’s your day! No matter what you choose, you won’t make everyone happy. When all else fails, go with what you and your fiancé enjoy. As I’ve mentioned, people love it when the bride and groom show a little of themselves in the meal. Whether it’s a table favor with grandma’s cookies and the recipe, or adding your favorite pizza as a late night snack, try to include a little of the two of you if you can.

These are just a few suggestions that can help in the process. Remember that no matter what you choose, it’s your wedding day. You’re getting married, and while choosing a meal is important, nothing is as important as becoming a Mr. and Mrs.

What's For Dinner ? Choosing A Wedding Menu

****Guest Post ****

 It's great to have our very own student providing us with a great guest post today.

Part 1

When it comes to choosing a menu for your wedding, it’s easy to get overwhelmed. Whether the facility is catering for you or you are bringing in a caterer, deciding what everyone will eat is kind of a big deal. Not only do you want the food to be delicious and beautifully presented, but you want to make sure that you choose things that most people (hopefully everyone) will enjoy. Below are a few tips to help keep your menu decisions as stress free as possible.



Decide what kind of wedding you want to have. Think about what you want the overall feel of the event to be. Do you want a buffet meal or a plated meal? Are you looking for food stations or an hors d’oeurves reception?

If you are looking for an elegant, classic and mostly traditional wedding, stick with plated. Assign everyone a seat with a menu card to let people know what they can expect. If you want to be even more formal, try serving several courses, such as a plated appetizer, followed by salad, then a soup or sorbet course, and then your entrée. And get creative if you want! Just because it’s a formal meal doesn’t mean it has to be stuffy. Ask if the chef has a signature dish or maybe a comfort food that can be served in a gourmet fashion. For example, I once had a bride who had to have macaroni and cheese at her wedding, but didn’t want it look like a kids meal. So she served a gourmet macaroni and cheese as its own course. Your guests will love that you incorporated a favorite side dish into your meal.

Added benefit: Plated meals take the least amount of time to serve- about an hour from salad to cake, if you serve the traditional three courses - so you can plan to get to the fun stuff as soon as possible!

Looking for something a little more fun? Try food stations. This relatively new trend in food allows your guests to try whatever they want in whatever order they want. Again, this style can lend itself to some really interesting presentations. Make sure you include stations that guests can make a full dinner out of if you are hosting an evening event. For example, you’ll want to include a protein, like a carving station, a starch, like a mashed potato bar or a risotto station, and a green of some kind, such as a large vegetable display or salad station.

Another way to go is offering different cuisines at different stations. Try an Asian station with sushi and spring rolls. Offer an Italian station with an antipasto display and bruschetta selections while a culinary attendant offers your guests made to order pasta dishes. At the American station, present sliders with a toppings bar.

Added benefit: This is a great way to go if you and your fiancé can’t exactly decide on a theme.

Lindsay Sanders is the Catering Services Manager at the Hilton President, Downtown Kansas City’s only AAA Four Diamond Hotel. She coordinates all weddings and wedding related events for the Hilton President, and has been in the hospitality industry for six years.